02/23/01 Teens16_19
[IEATSHIT] I EAT SHIT! YUMYUM!
*** IEATSHIT is magically summoned by kNarf to TOILET!
[applefloss] *** User IEATSHIT (142.177.56) added to ignore list ( 142.177.56 )! >> wanna
guess why?
[kNarf] bad breath applefloss?
02/23/01 Teens16_19
*** KICK WARNING User BEERMAN warned by Gilligan 5651 ( Teens16_19 ) ( relation
to drugs )
[kNarf] I'm related to Tylenol, can you kick me too?
03/08/01 Forest
[Pez] My penis. It's all stiff and slick with excitement for you.
[Pez] Why, it's even twitching.
[fraNk] well, I'm mighty disturbed by your pleasure stick
[Pez] Look. *twitch twitch*
[stonecold316wa] you guys are f@#$in gay
[fraNk] foolin gay? forkin gay? flamin gay? feelin gay?
[Pez] No we're not. We're Heterosexually impared.
*** JimmyGnomePro (205.182.50) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as
JimmyGnomePro enters the clearing between the trees.
[Pez] Finally gave up the amatuer ranks, Jimbo?
[JimmyGnomePro] You betcha, vaginator.
[DarkSilence] Come, Jimmy, gather 'round as we observe the workings of Pez's peznis.
[Pez] It even has power-foreskin and cruise control.
[DarkSilence] The thought of power-foreskin just doesn't seem right.
[JimmyGnomePro] Ah, what I've always wanted to know about the peznis but were afraid
to ask.
[Pez] Don't knock it til you try it.
[fraNk] ahh the vaginator, mine broke down and it's taking months to get the replacement
suction motor
[JimmyGnomePro] Oh, I learned the merits and pitfalls of a foreskin last time I talked to
Darkie. That reminds me, I have to go find mine.
[fraNk] you lost your foreskin? WOE IS YOU
[JimmyGnomePro] It's probably still at the hospital in a jar of ether.
[fraNk] I think that would be a jar of formaldehyde, unless you like your foreskin knocked
out so you can take advantage of it
[JimmyGnomePro] It's labelled "JimmyGnome's foreskin, net wt. 3 tons."
[Pez] That's a lot of foreskin.
[Pez] I had mine bronzed and gave it to my highschool sweetheart.
[Pez] She still has no idea.
[DarkSilence] Jimmy's got a lot of penis.
[JimmyGnomePro] My dick's so big, I lost ten pounds due to circumcision. Any better,
Dark?
[JimmyGnomePro] Nearly got the lice beat out of me when I told that one.
[Pez] God couldn't beat the lice out of your hide, Jimmy.
[fraNk] lice lay eggs, does this make them part of the bird family?
[fraNk] Cuz I think a lice pooped on my car
[Obsolete] Snakes are birds.
[fraNk] Obsolete, is that the name of a poem?
[Obsolete] Not to the best of my knowledge...
[Pez] Moose are birds.
[Pez] 'Cause they have antlers.
[DarkSilence] Birds are a popular species.
[fraNk] Birds are Felatio
[fraNk] BECAUSE THEY SUCK!!!
[UnMoira] *pelts fraNk with sausages for not saying hello earlier*
[fraNk] ooh sausages, I don't know if I should be horny or hungry
03/08/01 Forest
[JimmyGnomePro] You know, I came to the realization yesterday that aikido was useless in
the capacity of proactively beating up on someone else; you can merely defend yourself against a
would-be up-beater.
[JimmyGnomePro] When I mentioned this to my Sensei, he told me to take a step to the
left.
[JimmyGnomePro] He proved me wrong when I attempted to do so.
[fraNk] never attempt a roundhouse kick on someone who knows aikido, unless of course
you enjoy having your plant leg broken in two places
[DarkSilence] Get flattened?
[JimmyGnomePro] Flattened? Nah, part of my spine still sticks up.
[JimmyGnomePro] Wait, that's my femur. Never mind.
[fraNk] that is true Jimmy but I feel knowing defense really well is best, you can use the
slightest of offense on someone in combination with aikido and basically make them look like a raging
fool
[JimmyGnomePro] The Wisdom of JimmyGnome, vol. 3, chapter 5, verse II, 7th inning,
bases loaded, here's the pitch, it's outta here.
*** fraNk is now known as RAGINGFOOL .
* RAGINGFOOL suddenly attacks JimmyGnome before he can hit the ball!!!
* RAGINGFOOL is flattened, as his tonsils become his uterus
[Obsolete] I only know offense.
[Obsolete] And some quite limited defense. Heh.
[Pez] I only know running away/crying.
*** RAGINGFOOL is now known as fraNk .
[fraNk] wait, that didn't sound right, my last comment *L*
[fraNk] that would mean Jimmy orally assaulted me, let's back that one up a bit
[Pez] Aw. fraNk's mouth is now open for business.
[DarkSilence] So what's your mouth, fraNk? *L*
[DarkSilence] vagifraNk-canal
03/08/01 Forest
[korn] anyone wann achat?
[JimmyGnomePro] We already are chatting, you mispelled bushel of grain, you.
[fraNk] achat is scary, it's a form of martial art chatting
[fraNk] It involves typing your keys but a different letter comes up, like it's a chat with
subtitles or some shit
[JimmyGnomePro] Martial art chatting? Heh, neat, I'll go there and help everyone who
tries to /kick me merge with the mat.
[DarkSilence] A chat with subtitles...
[Obsolete] It'd be fun to switch around the letter-stickers on a keyboard.
[fraNk] Chatting with subtitles, Version 1.0
[fraNk] Earl1 is a pretty cool guy - (low in brain cells, continual desire to touch young
boys)
[fraNk] I love the weather outside, it's truly fun!!! (GOD DAMN SNOW, TAKE A PISS
AND I HAVE TO BREAK THE FROZEN STREAM OFF MY SCHLONG)
[fraNk] certain ops are really mistreated here by abusive chatters (HEY PULL YOUR
HEADS OUT, QUIT KICKING FOR STUPID THINGS AND THEY WILL QUIT ABUSING YOU)
[fraNk] and that, folks, was 'chatting with subtitles 1.0'
[DarkSilence] You know, 40plus is a warm, gentle, and enjoyable place. ( WHY WON'T
THEY DIE )
[Pez] I think fraNk is a funny and intelligent guy. (Man, does he ever stop?)
[DarkSilence] I like this subtitle deal.
[DarkSilence] Although it is rather intuitive to my meanings.
[fraNk] achat is brought to you by OB telephones, designed by a woman doctor to better
fit a woman's body
[fraNk] KevinsBacon, oink to you asalamalickumlater
[KevinsBacon] um.. yeah. Oink.
[fraNk] wow, I'm thinking we have a regular plethora of stuff to use for the Insanity Pages
here (GOD THIS SHIT IS LAME AND I HOPE THAT USING A BIG WORD MAKES ME LOOK
SMART)
03/08/01 Forest
[JimmyGnomePro] Hmm, hmm. Hey Pez, what was your zodiac again?
[Pez] Mine? Regular of Chinese?
[fraNk] Mine is Turtle, Gnomey
[fraNk] cuz I always have to go potty
[Pez] Turtleneck?
[fraNk] I have a new Turtlenut cup, it is very stylish
[Pez] I have a bull scrotum hat, myself.
[Pez] It gets all tight in the winter.
[fraNk] you mean you have a hat for your bull like package or a hat made from a bull's
package for your head? or both?
[Pez] Just for my head.
[JimmyGnomePro] Now, about what was I going to fart?
[JimmyGnomePro] Oh yeah, Pez' horoscope.
[Pez] That's right. What is it, Jimmy?
[JimmyGnomePro] You are kind, loving, loyal, gentle, cubic, smelly, retarded, and green.
All your friends look up to you (and chant, "Jump!"). An opportunity for promotion will come your
way on Sunday. You suck!
[fraNk] I always know my horoscope: Today, you will get up and think about working out.
Of course, you will most likely sit on your fat ass and waste away on your savings some more without
getting a job, and get fatter eating fast food. Sometime you will poop and pee, probably wont shower,
waste time on the net galavanting around with idiots, then go to bed.
[JimmyGnomePro] Ahem... *nudges fraNk* You forgot the best part.
[JimmyGnomePro] "You suck!"
[DarkSilence] That's the icing on the cake.
[Pez] The stem on the cherry.
[Pez] Stem = hair.
[DarkSilence] Or perhaps the catcher in the rye.
[DarkSilence] Or even the pimple on the penis.
[JimmyGnomePro] I always catch 'er eye.
[fraNk] or the finger in her pie?
[fraNk] pimple on the penis? you perhaps should go see someone about that, they have
wonderful treatments
[fraNk] not that I know *looks around nervously*
[fraNk] I bought the newest in advancements in condoms, the Firestorm Condom, it has
fireants in it, but what I failed to realize was that it was not very pleasurable for either of us and we
ended up using a lot of bug spray and aloe vera cream following our less than romantically painful
interlude
[JimmyGnomePro] Wot? That spoony bard!
[DarkSilence] I can also press a button under my scrotum and have my penis launch about
40 feet and detonate.
[fraNk] HOLY SHIT *buffer suddenly violated heavily by other ops* RAPE RAPE RAPE
[DarkSilence] It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's SOME GUY'S PENIS WITH A ROCKET
ATTACHED TO IT!
[Pez] Becareful during intercourse, Dark. You might accidentaly set it off and blow up your
computer screen.
[fraNk] *L* GI JOE action penis, he really left Barbie disheveled and Ken feeling very
pissed and wussy like
[JimmyGnomePro] If it's a smart missile, be sure you're thinking with your dick.
[DarkSilence] I've been through six monitors already. Don't joke about that. Not to
mention all the TV's I've busted, toilet tanks, shower walls, etc..
[fraNk] yah, I should never have invited DarkSilence out for oysters, I had to wear an eye
patch for 8 months
[DarkSilence] So slimy.. so tasty....
[KevinsBacon] *LMAO* I can't stay here..
[fraNk] THEN GO IF YE MUST, FAIR MAIDEN BACON
*** KevinsBacon (65.5.111) has left location Forest
[fraNk] TO BACON, OR NOT TO BACON, THAT>>> IS THE QUESTION
[Pez] And what did the oysters taste like, Dark? BWAHAHAHAHHAHAH!! Las Vegas,
here I come.
[DarkSilence] The way the shell caresses my loins makes me want to ... GOD DAMNIT
MY MONITOR AGAIN
[fraNk] Julia23 my love, be not quiet for ye stirreth the loinal fires within
[Julia23] *laughing* who are you?
[fraNk] Oh Julia, where for art thou lovely eyes and respectable hips and oh my perky
mmmm yes *nibbles on your big toe
[Julia23] *giggling* give me back my toe!
[DarkSilence] My big toe is longer than some of my fingers.
[Pez] That's because you're a monkey, Darky.
[DarkSilence] Oooooo Oooooooo AHHHHH AHHHHH!
[fraNk] oh wait, that wasn't your toe, that was on your chest *jumps back* my most
humble apologies for mistaking a nipple for a digit
[Julia23] *eyes wide*
[DarkSilence] That's some nipple she must have.
[Pez] Or a small breast.
[Julia23] *blushing*
[fraNk] it was *thinks back* those were the days, a nipple so beautiful, so intense, so
explosive, reminds me of my days in Guatamala
[Pez] I thought that said "reminds me of my days with Grandma".
*** Im2Horny has been magically summoned by fraNk to Forest !
[DarkSilence] Uh oh. Not this game again. *L*
[fraNk] wow, that guy has a hella set of antlers
[fraNk] Im2Horny for your cat, 2 horny for your cat
[Pez] I'd summon someone, but I'm afraid they'd stay.
*** imhorny has been magically summoned byDarkSilence to Forest !
* fraNk sings
[DarkSilence] We've got the original on it's way!
[fraNk] uh oh, WHO IS THE REAL HORNY *crazy circus music plays and bears ride
bicycles* WHO CAN TELL US???
*** KICK WARNING User imhorny warned by 1SOUTHERNGUY 916 ( Forest ) (nick)
[Pez] fraNk, my gut says it's imhorny, but I'm putting my money on im2horny!
[fraNk] Okay, we are going 2to1 that the real horny is im2horny
[Pez] EGADS! Sir Ruinsourfunalot has strucketh!
*** Kick imhorny by 1SOUTHERNGUY (nick).
[fraNk] AND WE HAVE A WINNER!!!
03/08/01 Forest
*** Str8nate (142.109.100) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as Str8nate
enters the clearing between the trees.
[Pez] Str8nate on weekdays, Gayjay on weekends.
[Pez] And LezLisa when they pay enough.
[fraNk] *LMAO*
[Pez] HAW HAW! fraNk is stooopid!
[fraNk] BiGary on friday
[fraNk] he gets confused
[DarkSilence] Str8nate is soliciting me for dirty underwear in my buffer.
[fraNk] Str8nate, I have heard of you, BiGary correct?
[Pez] Or BeastialityBob?
[fraNk] I think Alabama has that one covered Pez
[DarkSilence] OmnisexualOscar
[fraNk] BeastialityBama
[DarkSilence] That's PedophilePete, fraNk. *L*
[fraNk] AutoeroticAllen
[fraNk] SadoMasichistSean
[Pez] WhippinWally.
[DarkSilence] SubmissiveSally
[Pez] SpankinSally.
[DarkSilence] AnalAnnie
[DarkSilence] I used Sally first! 50 PUSHUPS!!
[fraNk] RapeEmAllRoger
[Pez] DoorknobSucker DarkSilence.
[DarkSilence] ShitInMyMouthSam
[fraNk] PoopchutePounderPez
[Pez] Heh heh.
[DarkSilence] PeznisChewingPez
[saeria] Goldenshower Greg
[Pez] FriskyFerretFuhkerfraNk.
[DarkSilence] FarmFornicationfraNk
[Pez] I used animal love first
[Pez] 100 PUSHUPS!!
[DarkSilence] SellMeYourPantiesSaeria
[saeria] hey, how'd you know i was in that market??
[Pez] CreampieCameron.
[fraNk] no no no, ForeskinFeelingfraNk
[Pez] RimmerRon.
[fraNk] TitTweakingTrevor
[Pez] VoyuerVanna.
[fraNk] NecrophiliaNate
[fraNk] don't let him around a road kill
[Pez] InterracialIra.
* saeria sings "you ain't got no foreskin, baby... i can't hold you tiiiiiiiight, you ain't got no
foreskin, lover... nothing soft to biiiiiiiiiiiiiite.. "hehe
[fraNk] hey, what a beautiful moving song saeria *whipes a tear away*
[saeria] FelcherFran
03/08/01 Forest
[Jaded] Pez, your page is not workin...
[Pez] HAW HAW! You fell for my dead link! I win, I win!
* Jaded laffs*
[Pez] Yesssssss! *pumps his arm in the air*
[fraNk] <- - This girl didn't know I had a camera and she was showering
[Pez] She didn't know she was showering?
[fraNk] no she didn't, and alas, like the graceful turkey, she drowned
03/08/01 /who in Forest
DarkSilence #24.65.216# Forest I blow. Hold onto your hat.
JimmyGnomePro 205.182.50 Forest Today's horoscope is: You suck!
KevinsBacon 65.5.111 Forest It sucks to not be me.
Pez #205.188.196# Forest I'm Pez. You suck.
fraNk 209.50.5 Forest Can't talk, busy sucking
03/12/01 Forest
[Sweet_Roses] lays down and wait for some people to come
[Minion] I hope they aren't coming all over the place
[Minion] that can get really messy you know