01/13/02 in personal messages

*fool* (203.200.95) hi,i m a sexy man in sexy mood
*fool* (203.200.95) will u like sexy chat
sent to-> *fool* not really, how about I rub your whole body down with honey and let a
grizzly bear loose on you
*fool* (203.200.95) do u want to kill me
sent to-> *fool* no, but a severe mauling would be acceptable, don't you agree?
*fool* (203.200.95) yeah,how is ur pussy
sent to-> *fool* my pussy is inverted and goes by another name
*fool* (203.200.95) what name
sent to-> *fool* PENIS!!!!!!
*fool* (203.200.95) i wanna suck that
*fool* (203.200.95) i m amasterbating
*fool* (203.200.95) ur male
*fool* (203.200.95) i also like being homo
sent to-> *fool* do you like having toothpicks dipped in gasoline jammed into your scrotum
then lit on fire?

01/17/02 Teens16_19

[WetWildGirl] my God is there any men in here who can carry a conversation without
asking what color panties I have on LOL or SOS what ever
[fraNk67] what a stupid statement, your nickname is WetWildGirl and you question why
people ask sexual questions?

01/17/02 Forest

[lover] i have a nice tight pussy
* Naphtalia gasps* Oh my..
[fraNk] Oh lover, let's go then *L*
[lover] wanna play?
[fraNk] yes, lover, you first though
[lover] what country are you in?
[lover] i'm in england
[fraNk] we are in Zimbabwe, huge black trees everywhere
[fraNk] let's say Sandman has a big one, what would you do with it?
[lover] i would beat it with my big breasts
[Naphtalia] ugh
[fraNk] really lover? then what?
[lover] i getting horny
[fraNk] really?
[fraNk] girls with antlers are just what Sandman likes
[Sandman_] I got a 15 incher lover
[Naphtalia] would you please play with your own tits?
[lover] i'm squeezing
[Naphtalia] that sooo turns me on.. MMmmmm..
[Sandman_] can you take it all lover even though your British?
[lover] can i see your 15" lover then?
[lover] i'll suck it good
[Sandman_] I dunno lover you conservitive eyes my not be able to handle the strain
[lover] we’re all gagging for it, anything will do

01/18/02 Forest

*** littleho (168.156.175) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as littleho enters
the clearing between the trees.
[fraNk] I suppose you are good for working in a midgets garden?
[littleho] yup
[littleho] damn good

01/18/02 Forest

*** rusty2 (209.224.180) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as rusty2 enters the
clearing between the trees.
[fraNk] rusty? Just add lotion...
[fraNk] I mean, oil
[fraNk] yes, I meant oil, or WD40
[fraNk] rusty + oil = satisfaction
[Jesusie] baby oil.
[Jesusie] made from real pressed babies

01/19/02 LocalShop

* kNarfinicky sings*
* kNarfinicky dances
* kNarfinicky cooks and cleans, call now, only four easy payments of 49.95 billed easily to
your credit card
* fraNk drinks a bottle of Nair
[fraNk] yummy
[fraNk] and you thought this was just regular Nair?
[fraNk] well, no, it's new diet nair with only 1 gram of fat!!!
[fraNk] now try Nair Twist with zesty lemon flavor!!!!

01/19/02 Forest

*** JeNniLiCiOuS (209.86.54) has left location Forest
[Suigam] whew! was getting seasick trying to read that nick

01/19/02 LocalShop

* fraNk lies under you
* fraNk gets on tops of you
* fraNk slides behind you
* Jesusie feels like a playground
[fraNk] hmm, a playground? *fascinating doctor, but remember I am a vulcan* *LOL*
[Jesusie] dammit spock, don't you know i lust after those sexy pointed ears of yours? kiss
me you vulcan fool!
* fraNk grabs the doctor and shoves a tongue down his throat *to hell with my emotionless
half, I must give in to my human desires* GAY TREK WILL BE BACK RIGHT AFTER A
MESSAGE FROM OUR SPONSORS*
[fraNk] TROJAN MAN *hello trojan man*
[Jesusie] *LMAO*
[fraNk] you realize the thought of those two kissing is enough to cause me to shrivel into
nothing downstairs? *L*

01/21/02 Dungeon

[belldandy] if you want your girlfriend to swallow, do NOT eat a lot of spicey foods.
* ThugImmortal considers belldandy is not as innocent as she appears*
[belldandy] what? oh no.... I'm..... I'm a virgin ()=0)
[belldandy] really
[fraNkums] LIES
[fraNkums] more like ): ^ 0 <====
[belldandy] *lol*
* ThugImmortal agrees with fraNk......*
[fraNkums] then ( : ^ ) --- <====
[ThugImmortal] Don't like it when you come up with a wet shiny face... just to hear...
"Ermm..no i don't do that...."...
[belldandy] spitting is a nasty habit
* ThugImmortal Likes the phrase...*.. "I just cleaned my floor... Cum in my mouth, so we
don't get it dirty...."
* ThugImmortal Damnn...That another thing.. * When they ask you to wash first.....Talk
about moment killer.....
[fraNkums] is it evil to go into Powerpoint and design really professional looking medical
brochures that state (falsely) that semen is great not only for a girls complexion (reduces acne by 87%)
but also reduces the risk of breast cancer by almost half and nearly eliminates osteoperosis?
[belldandy] *lol* it's a good source of protein and is low in calories
* ThugImmortal Damn......Used that excuse once....Kind of...
[fraNkums] then put them all over your gf's apartment?
[fraNkums] like next to the toilet
[fraNkums] under her bed
[fraNkums] on top of the television
[fraNkums] in the freezer
[belldandy] how's she gonna find it under her bed? *never looks under hers*
[fraNkums] of course, knowing my luck, I'd go over to her place to surprise her and find 10
guys in line getting thier rocks off on her face *hello dear, I had a zit this morning so I thought I'd
really attack it"
* ThugImmortal Figures the best way to get it is just Ask.....
[belldandy] hehehe *doesn't need to be asked*
* ThugImmortal Wonders about belldandy*
[belldandy] hey, I'm in a monogomous relationship. I'm loyal. I just know how to keep my
man happy is all. He don't have to ask me. I just think of myself as..... polite hehe

01/21/02 Forest

[FruityPebbles] shes a kitten actually.. and she is a totall spaz.. she has ADD i swear
[fraNk] my cat has MINUS
[fraNk] it's just as bad *nods*
[Starbelly] MINUS?

01/21/02 in personal messages

*Jesusie* (206.107.252) it seems everyone thinks idaho is ohio but it's not
sent to -> *Jesusie* well, I might be geographically challenged but I'm not geografuckilly
stupid *L*

01/21/02 Forest

[mellon] wtf? now my phones not ringing?
[Mink] take it off vibrate
[fraNk] I wonder if they make a cell phone about the shape of a cucumber? *ponders*
[Mink] *L* call me
[Mink] CALL ME CALL ME BABY
[fraNk] I'll call Mink *LOL*
[Mink] why'd you stop? I was almost there?
* fraNk grabs cell phone
[Mink] 1 800 555 MINK
[fraNk] I'm going to try that number *L*
* fraNk dials up
* Mink vibrates* OH BABY!
* fraNk waits
* Mink 's voice mail says: CALL ME AGAIN I"M ALMOST THERE!
[Mink] ***beep***
[fraNk] welcome to skytell 2 way messaging, you have reached the mailbox of 555-6465
*goes into leaving a message speel*
[Mink] I wonder what kind of msgs I'd get if that was my real voice message thing *L*
[Mink] people would certainly call me back later hehe
[fraNk] I would call and call and call
[fraNk] but only while you are at church *nods*
* Mink screams OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD in church*
[fraNk] the priest leans over to the alterboy "wow, she's gets almost as excited about
religion as you do"
[Mink] what would you say if I answered? hehe
[fraNk] praise god goodbye *click*
[Mink] "hang on a sec, I gotta wipe off my phone"
[fraNk] I bet that would make a great movie
[Mink] it could be titled "Call Me God"
* Jesusie smites fraNk
* fraNk glues Mink's eyebrows to Jesusie's boobs
[fraNk] TAKE A LOOK
* Mink 's eyes get poked out*
*** sexy_eyes (209.148.228) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as sexy_eyes
enters the clearing between the trees.
[fraNk] wow, what an entrance for sexy eyes *L*
[Mink] almost like my eyes *attempts to pry her face off Jesusie's chest*
* Jesusie smites fraNk harder.
*** Earl1 (#64.0.99#) Forest / Time seems to stop magically as Earl1 enters the
clearing between the trees.
[Earl1] howdy frank
[fraNk] hello there EARL *grabs bullhorn* CAN I HELP YOU?
[Earl1] no help needed
[fraNk] are you sure?
[fraNk] sometimes I wonder *L*
[Earl1] wonders??????
*** Earl1 (#64.0.99#) has left location Forest

01/21/02 Forest

[fraNk] do they even make personal massagers that run on D batteries? *LOL*
[fraNk] and who would own one?
[fraNk] "yes, I bought one yesterday, called MrStretchEm"
[Mink] it'd be all battery... and..... a nice aerodynamic shape
[fraNk] someone was telling me the other day they found one that plugs into a cigarrette
lighter *LOL* can you imagine?
[Mink] my cell phone plugs into the cigarette lighter.
[fraNk] well, this is sure a boring drive, hmmmmm, I think I'll..... "click"
VRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
[fraNk] yes, this is KLIN Radio Traffic Eye In The Sky Chopper, we have a Blue Subaru
careening all over the road, at unpredictable speeds, this is a wreck just waiting to happen

01/23/02 Forest

[Caeridwen] Sorry i didnt mean to wear my church clothes without a bra
[fraNk] Sorry, I didn't mean to wear a hat with no clothes to church
[Caeridwen] pastor mike would just point and laugh anyway
* annabellee pulls on Jorrun's doink *
[annabellee] honk honk
[Jorrun_] doink?
[annabellee] doinks are a good thing.....*L*
[annabellee] honk.....honk....beep!
[annabellee] beep??? WTF??? *smacks Jorrun's doink*
[fraNk] OUCH
[Jorrun_] suuuuuuuuuuure]
[annabellee] must be malfunctioning!
[fraNk] sometimes when I'm smacking my doink around, I drink Nesquick, *smiles bright
for the camera* Nesquick, proud sponsor of the Forest and doink smacking everywhere
* annabellee claps for fraNk *
[thundershrew] yay commercialism!
[annabellee] a word from our sponsors???
[Caeridwen] never never smack a doink
* annabellee goes for the doink repair kit *
[Caeridwen] you are supposed to pet the doink, kiss the doink,, become one with the doink
[annabellee] become one????
[fraNk] poor Jorrun
[annabellee] HAHAHAHA
[fraNk] his Doink may never work right again
* annabellee sits down with the repair kit and pulls Jorrun over toward her *
[Caeridwen] i thought that was called wanking not smacking
[annabellee] scissors.....no.
[annabellee] hmm. plyers.....no.
[annabellee] rubber mallet???? WTF is this???
[annabellee] hmm......
[Caeridwen] be gentle with the doink anna , he is your friend

01/24/02 20plus

[fraNk] I HAVE BEEN ON THIS CHAT LONGER THAN ANYONE!!!
[fraNk] Except for Alamak himself and Ronald the Janitor
[fraNk] Back in Nam we used to use Alamak all the time
[Aine] youre nuts! but they are cute!
[fraNk] MY NUTS ARE CUTE???
[fraNk] ahhhhhh thanks Aine!!!
[fraNk] you really shouldn't have said that though
[Aine] LMFAO at fraNk
[fraNk] now all the girl poodles will come to my door for my cashews
* Aine is just buzy laffing her butt off now...please excuse.....
* Nova_Super has got eye strain
[sploosh] strained eyes makes good baby food
[fraNk] once I had jock strain
[fraNk] I won't go into too much detail but it involved my hand
[fraNk] anyways, how is everyone here in 20 plus tonite, are you having a great time?
*stands on stage and looks out smiling*

01/25/01 Forest

[blacklungs_com] comp is crashing again later
[fraNkobotic] my computer crashed once, the authorities made me take a breathalizer test
too
[fraNkobotic] of course, I was drunk

01/25/01 Forest

* Micaela files her fingernails. *
* fraNkobotic files his ear wax
[fraNkobotic] under "GROSS BODY SECRETIONS" in the file cabinet

01/25/01 Forest

[non_sequitor] i actually worked up the guts to go ask Martha if she wants to go out tonight
and she wasnt in her room
[AshenSouls] Martha Stewart is a busy lady though, non. Don't take it personally
[non_sequitor] shut the fuck up
[non_sequitor] its a sigh from god.
[fraNkobotic] god sighs??
[non_sequitor] gods sigh. yes.
[fraNkobotic] that is bad when god sighs, means he has lost faith in you, try harder *L*