12/24/99 Forest

[poopgod] he 'membered i'm MacDuff
[Minion] the crime dog??
[Minion] arg, poopgod, take a bite outta crime
[Suicide_King] thats McGruff
[Minion] isn't MacDuff the name of the beer on the Simpsons?
* poopgod makes a Crime Doodie to combat injustice..it immediately assaults kNarf* oops
[Suicide_King] thats just "Duff"

12/24/99 Cellar

[fraNk] I am wondering what to buy my sister for christmas, she says she needs something for like
fitness gear
[fraNk] What should I buy her, SuicideKing and scoot?
[Suicide_King] a vibrator that you have to climb up upon
[fraNk] Hmmmmm, no, I got her that last year
[Suicide_King] me too..but it was for my mom
[fraNk] I'm not sure my mom could truly appreciate a gift like that
[Soldat] Buy her a porn star
[fraNk] No, not that either, she doesn't like to bring work home
[Soldat] Have her legs broken and then enroll her in physical therapy...
[fraNk] wow, Soldat, that is a true gift that she can't call last minute, great idea

12/24/99 Forest

[IWshIWsAFish] you ops all suck
[Chadwick] ahhh come on
* IWshIWsAFish comes on Chadwick
[Chadwick] ahhh yes yes yes heh heh heh
[IWshIWsAFish] that was certainly satisfying *smokes a cigarette*
[Nell] sounds like you guys are orgasming

12/25/99 Cellar

* Iceman1 pulls out an M60, rotates his selector switch from safe to swiss cheese, aims at the coffin
and turns it to swiss cheese...
[fraNk] oh my god nooooooo, that was my uncle rodriguez
[fraNk] you just annihalated his corpse
[Iceman1] ohh well too bad...
[fraNk] damn you iceman, you need to say something in his memory
[fraNk] ICEMAN!!
[Iceman1] he was a good man, but now... he is swiss chese..*L*
* Iceman1 opens up a 40 ozer..* this ones for all my dead homies... * pours it out over the side of the
coffin on all the dead bodies..*
[fraNk] damn you Iceman, you are desecrating my uncle!!
[fraNk] and wasting beer
[fraNk] I can't decide which is worse

12/25/99 Forest

* kNarfinky parks the bulldozer in its' appropriate place, in his cabin garage
[Ellies] couldn;t you have told me you were moving the bulldozer and I culd have stood there while
you ran me over
[kNarfinky] perhaps, but cleaning bone fragments from between the road wheels under the tracks
really is time consuming and I am feeling lazy today

12/25/99 Forest

[kNarfinky] If you have an itchy sack, press one, if you do not have a touch tone phone, please stay
on the line, and someone will assist your shortly

12/25/99 Forest

*** ffrraaNNkk (209.50.5) Forest time seems to stop magically as someone enters the clearing
between the trees
[ffrraaNNkk] yyoouu nneeeedd nneeww ggllaasssseess
[Laud] Twice the fraNk, but luckily only the same number of posts

12/25/99 Forest

[Dark_One] I'd kill you there too, as soon as you walked into the same room as me, you hit 300 plus
agro dragons
[kNarfitUP] for a minute I thought that said 300 plus negro dragons, I was like geez, you should say
african american you know

12/25/99 Forest

[kNarfitUP] I took a picture of my penis, i'd scan it but the photo is just too big
[kNarfitUP] I'm ready to leave, but I'm quite lazy, someone kick me please FUCK
*** Kick kNarfitUP by FruityPebbles (lang ..).
*** Dark_One has partially cleared the room.
[Dark_One] heh heh

12/26/99 Cellar

[kNarfuntime] did I ever tell you all that I am psychic???
[sixsixseven] wow you are psychic?
[sixsixseven] i already have a psychic friend though
[BitterAngel] i'm not psychic but I can read my best friends thoughts
[kNarfuntime] Well, I am psychic, watch this...
[BitterAngel] watch what?
[kNarfuntime] excuse me
[kNarfuntime] *burp*
[kNarfuntime] TAH DAH!!!
[BitterAngel] hehehehe that was horrible!!

12/27/99 Forest

[INTI] are you a boy or a girl frank?
[fraNk] I'm a girl, you fucking idiot
[fraNk] look at my name for christs sake
[INTI] i see you are just a MIERDA fraNK
[fraNk] if MIERDA means "about to shove my foot in your ass" then definitely that is a yes

12/27/99 Forest

[fraNk] Zor!!! Welcome oh shamefully endowed one
* Zor picks up a smurf tosses it in the air then throws it at Black_Heart.* Now now. None of that
stuff here.
[fraNk] I once dated a smurt, terrible kisser, talked about how much he hated everything all the
damn time
[Sandman_] frank I did not and I'm not terrible kisser
[fraNk] really??
* fraNk kisses Sandman
* Sandman_ kisses frank back* okay I forgive you
[fraNk] bleck
[fraNk] he had a dip in

12/27/99 Forest

[succy] fraNk's the mother ferking man
[fraNk] oh shit, are you with the FBI succy?
[fraNk] not many people know about me and the ferking with my maternal sponser
[succy] federal bureau of insinuation? you bet I am

12/27/99 Forest

[fraNk] Your career is low on inspiration, hit 5 if you wish to be a porn star
[Pez] 5! And a half!
[Pez] Inches! Heh heh.
[succy] 44444 just naked stills for me thanks
[SuPerDorK] clever...
[fraNk] hit 6 now if you wish to speak to a porn star representative
[SuPerDorK] 555555555
[SuPerDorK] as long as theyre not all hairy and shit...thats gross...
[fraNk] *6* please hold while we connect you with ron jeremey
[fraNk] oh dammit, I wanted Joey Silvera
[fraNk] hang up now if you wish for a large handsome man to get you from behind
[fraNk] shit, now what??? damn, normally this is when I hang up
[fraNk] I think that on this particular occasion, I shall stay on hold for a while
[fraNk] I rubbed up with rogaine, I have a wiener with sideburns now
[fraNk] NEWS FLASH
[fraNk] forest stunned, fraNk the only one with speach ability
[Pez] Why is it that only ugly hairy white guys have big pee-pees?
[Pez] *sob* I'll never have a big pee pee!
[succy] nononono you DO NOT want one that big. they'll all run away in terror
[fraNk] and you are ugly Pez, talk about getting shafted at both ends, HAHAHAH

12/28/99 Forest

[Sandman_] I want to get a licenese to raise falcons
[Sandman_] actually my father and I are starting up a pheasant hunting preserve
[succy] don't you mean reserve? preserve sounds like you're making pheasant jam...
[Sandman_] no preserve
[Kaihrien] you can make jam with pheasants? *blinks*
[succy] hell you can make jam with anything. hehehe just mush it up

12/28/99 Forest

[___] Hi, I’m new here
[fraNk] Uhm, I'm rejoicing
[___] DAMN /id!
*** ___ is now known as Pez.
[Pez] Well, the cat's outta the bag. And someone done shaved it.

12/28/99 Forest

[_Sandman] its a karma sutra postion tanzee were you pull up on the females butt while you umm
insert in
[fraNk] is that like when you finish, insert two fingers like a bowling ball and carry the girl home?
[succy] isn't that a sixpack?
[tanzee] lucky strike! score! no gutter ball! *S*
[Pez] Wow...that gives the ball buffer so many new uses...
[fraNk] In that particular sport, I think a spare is better than a strike, but all you care about is scoring
just once

12/28/99 Forest

[Pez] Howdy all.
[QuinPenance] Pez.. Pezan..Pezant, Like.. Pezance, Insert an N.. Oh, my GOD.. Pez, your trying to
BE ME!
[fraNk] I knew there was something fishy about Pez, and now Quin has explained the conspiracy, it
is bound to be an Oliver Stone flick
[QuinPenance] Pez, I know you admire and stalk me.. But THIS?
[Pez] I can't help myself, Quin. It's...it's...genetic or something.
[QuinPenance] My god.. Your not saying that.. We're..
[QuinPenance] We're..
[Pez] Say it Quin...say it!
[Pez] SAAAY IT!
* succy dramatic music*
[succy] hehe you sound like van damme at the end of Blood Sport
[QuinPenance] *..Gulp*.. FATHEr and SON?!
[Pez] Ew, no. I was thinking more on the lines of 'brothers'.

12/28/99 Forest

[_Sandman] anytime is good to have sex form behind
[Pez] Anal sex, anal sex! It's the best, it's the best! But it's a mess, it's a mess!
[fraNk] forget anal sex, yikes
[fraNk] See succy Suckin It Hard In This Rare German XXX Video!!
[succy] I don't know any germans.
[QuinPenance] *l* I actually clicked that.
[fraNk] heh heh, did it take you anywhere, Quin?
[QuinPenance] Yeah, to Blue Balls Avenue *l*
[fraNk] Want Uncensored Live XXX Chat With Sandman?
[QuinPenance] Now, that one.. I didn't click PUT ME IN ONE! Mention my incredible stay power
and legendary dirty talk
[_Sandman] frank ack thats a pay only site :-)
[tanzee] yeah frank...sheesh, find a free one!
[fraNk] Click here to get to the next 1000 Pez flasher links!!
[_Sandman] ack I clicked on that and saw Pez naked now I'm blinded for life :-)
[Pez] See fraNk and Francis The Singing Mule!!! XXX All The Way!!!
[succy] he lies again

12/28/99 Forest

[succy] pez and I are meant to be
[Pez] We are?
* succy pouts* ok so we're not
[Pez] The real test is...are our genitals compatible?
[succy] I think so.
[Pez] Ah, nevermind.
[succy] it would make sense
[Pez] It would? So...yer NOT a hermaphrodite?
[succy] I'm not always sure what that is...
[Pez] Well, someone *cough cough fraNk cough* fed me some misinformation...
[Pez] Half man/half woman.
[succy] ack!
[Pez] Heh...or, people with genitalia of both sexes...
[succy] that's pretty sad that you guys talk about me hehheh